The subtitle of this post is The most ridiculous thing I have ever done intentionally. Or, The destruction of dogs’ self esteem
Today, April 1st, is Swoozie Louisa’s 8th birthday.
You’re probably thinking, dang, Swoozie looks so much like Lassie right here. And you are right.
Just in time for Swoozie’s birthday, inspiration struck. I jumped on Pinterest and looked up dog birthday cake. Pinterest didn’t let me down. Imagine it, pictures of adorable dogs staring intently at their very own birthday cakes.
Ah, anthropomorphism, how I love thee.
Naturally, I wanted such pictures of Swoozie, on this, her 8th birthday. Then I thought that the births of Ebby and Baby MertMert should also be celebrated on this day. We don’t know their real birthdays, so we might as well make April’s Fool’s Day a gala. That is how Swoozie’s party came to be known as Pug Birthday.
I scoured the internet to find the perfect cake for the dogs. The company I ended up going with was really great. I even got a text asking me when I wanted my dog cupcakes. My response was something along the lines of “As early as possible, but this is not urgent.” I wonder if there are ever urgent dog cake situations?
My only complaint with ordering the dog cupcakes online was that when they came in the mail, they were clearly marked as such:
I would have preferred the kind of discretion you get when you order other embarrassing items, like sex paraphernalia.
Regardless, the cupcakes turned out adorable.
Of the three dogs, Ebby was the most stoked about his birthday party.
Mertle was less thrilled than Ebby. She might have been scared of her birthday, actually. I guess she didn’t get the memo that this was a party.
And Swoozie. Swoozie hated her birthday. She wouldn’t even look at her dog cupcake, let alone stare at it intently like the Pinterest dogs. Darn it, Swoozie, stop crushing my Pinterest dreams.
In the picture below, notice how Swoozie, on the left, is turned away from the cupcake, as though she can’t bear the sight of it. Mertle looks completely depressed. At least Ebby is happy.
After I was done torturing the dogs at the table, I moved the party to the backyard.
By this point, neighbors were coming out to stare, so we did not decorate Ebby with balloons. Next year, Ebby, next year.
Considering that today is a holiday around these parts, I wish you all a very merry Pug Birthday.